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...Paskevic rose to be commander-in-chief, even though better generals were available. He did have some organising talent, but in his campaigns he emerged victorious only because his opponents were more incompetent than he. His critics claimed that he was only at ease when in retreat; he retreated when enemy troops advanced, believing that they would not dare to do so unless they were certain of their superiority; he retreated when the enemy was out of sight, anticipating an attack from an unexpected direction; he was even known to retreat when the enemy retreated, fearing a ruse.
Howard: Are you aware of the music known as jazz? Are you aware of jazz music, the movement of jazz?Vince: Why do you keep goin' on about jazz for?
Howard: Because it's the most important art form in the 20th century.
Vince: No one listens to jazz. Science teachers and the mentally ill, that's all jazz is for.
Howard: You better take that back, you electro ponce.
Vince: Or what?
Howard: You better just take it back, that's all.
Vince: I won't be taking that back, I'll be leaving it out there for all to see.
Howard: Drink it back up.
Vince: No. I hate jazz.
Howard: You hate jazz? You fear jazz. Huh?
Vince: Shut your mouth.
Howard: Ahhhh... you fear jazz, don't you?
Vince: No I don't.
Howard: You fear the lack of rules, the lack of boundaries. Oh its a fence, no its soft, ahh... What's happening? The shapes, the chaos! Huh? It has to be simple nursery rhymes for you, doesn't it? [to the tune of a nursery rhyme] Dee di dee di dee dee di. When the melody gets abstract, you mess your trousers and run to your mummy. [Howard starts scat singing].
So what will it take to increase breastfeeding rates in this country, other than stopping it being illegal in the 99.99999 per cent of the British Isles that isn't the lactating mothers' front rooms, of course? For myself, I was a constant, militant, public breastfeeder - but I can't now, three years later, remember quite why. Briefly analysing it, I would say it was probably a combination of: 7 per cent having a mother who contentedly breastfed eight children, in turn, for the first two years of their lives; 12 per cent being a rock-hard, ice-cool feminist warrior queen, like Sarah Connor in Terminator 2, but wearing a purple, white and green hat; and 81 per cent wanting the crying, screaming baby to just shuuuuuut uuuuuup before we set off all the fire alarms in Boots.
To be honest, I brought a geeky aesthetic to the process, in that I often pretended my breast milk was a killer laser beam. Once I'd built up a sufficient head of pressure, I'd jet my milk lasers across the room, "taking out" objects/people while making the "zzsswhoompf" light-sabre sound from Star Wars. Perhaps we could get more women into breastfeeding from that angle, encouraging them to use lactation for the purposes of pugilism. That way, until public breastfeeding is made legal, at least they could pick off disapproving art gallery security staff, one by one, with their mummy-guns.
- Source: The Times, 23 June 2008
The movie's takeaway catchphrase is "Mariska Hargitay," which is used by the title character as a fake-Hindi spiritual greeting. This is almost hilarious the first 11 or so times he does it, but by the time Guru Pitka (Mr. Myers) says "Mariska Hargitay" to Ms. Hargitay herself, it's somehow less amusing than it should be.
Which might sum up "The Love Guru" in its entirety but only at the risk of grievously understating the movie's awfulness. A whole new vocabulary seems to be required. To say that the movie is not funny is merely to affirm the obvious. The word "unfunny" surely applies to Mr. Myers's obnoxious attempts to find mirth in physical and cultural differences but does not quite capture the strenuous unpleasantness of his performance. No, "The Love Guru" is downright antifunny, an experience that makes you wonder if you will ever laugh again.
"I know he died, but I don't want change," one villager told Romanian TV.
The strange thing is, I can't seem to find anyone who bought X & Y, or who intends to buy Viva La Vida. For that matter, I have never encountered one person who has a kind word to say about Coldplay. None of my personal or professional acquaintances, nobody in the street or the local café, not a single soul will admit to liking Coldplay or purchasing their music. Indeed, most seem to agree that they epitomise everything that's wrong with modern rock music. So who's buying all their albums? Who are those masses politely arrayed in their thousands at stadiums when Coldplay play? Is it some secret society, an Opus Dei of dreary anthemic music? And where do they congregate, other than at stadiums and arenas? Do they have parties? And if so, how many slash their wrists at these parties? What's the attrition rate?...
Their music sounds like Radiohead with all the spiky, difficult, interesting bits boiled out of it, resulting in something with the sonic consistency of wilted spinach; it retains the crowd-pleasing hooks and singalong choruses while dispensing with the more challenging, dissonant aspects and sudden, 90-degree shifts in direction. Chris Martin's decision to sing in a register that, at times, strains his vocal almost to a yodel brazenly apes Thom Yorke's more skilful and restrained use of a similar vocal gambit. But where Yorke's subtler employment brings soul into prog-rock, Martin's gauche overuse has become a cliché, which itself has been aped by the likes of James Blunt, perhaps the band's chief rival in musical mawkishness.
- The Independent, 11 June 2008
The judge was talking to a defendant in the dock about his offending when he was interrupted by mutterings from the public gallery. He asked if someone had a problem, and Scott said he did because the judge was making the defendant uncomfortable with his persistent questioning. Judge Crosbie said he would take his time if he had to decide whether to send someone to jail.Scott then said "well f... hurry up".
'The Workers' and Peasants' Government points out that in our society behind this liberal screen, in fact there is only freedom for the property-owning classes, seizing the lion's share of the press, freely poisoning minds and introducing confusion in the consciousness of the masses. Everyone knows that the bourgeois press is one of the most powerful weapons of the bourgeoisie. Especially in critical moments when the new power, the power of the workers and peasants, is only just gaining a foothold, it is impossible to leave this weapon entirely in the hands of the enemy at this time, when it is no less dangerous than bombs and machine-guns. That is why temporary and extraordinary measures have been adopted to cut off the stream of filth and lies in which the yellow and green press would gladly drown the youthful victory of the people.
As soon as the new order is consolidated, all administrative restrictions on the press will be lifted; it will be allowed full freedom within the limits of responsibility before the courts according to the widest and most progressive laws in this respect. Considering, however, that only the absolutely necessary limits on the press, even in critical moments, are permissible, the Council of People's Commissars decrees as follows:
General Regulations on the Press
1) Press organs to be closed are only those: a) calling for open resistance or insubordination to the Workers' and Peasants' Government; b) sowing confusion by the obvious distortion of facts; c) calling for openly criminal actions, i.e. of a criminally punishable character.
2) The temporary or permanent banning of press organs is carried out only by a resolution of the Council of People's Commissars.
3) The present regulation is temporary and will be revoked by a special decree with the onset of normal conditions of social life.
(Signed) Chairman of the Council of People's Commissars,
Vladimir Ul'yanov (Lenin)'
'Justin Sullivan, managing director of Regent Jet, which leases private airplanes, said most clients in real estate and on Wall Street are switching to chartered jets over private jets, and cutting their flight budgets by about 25 percent. One New York real estate developer cut his budget to less than $250,000 a year from $1.5 million a year."A year ago, he would have only flown Gulfstreams," Mr. Sullivan said. "Now it's moving to the point where he's flying Beech jets and Learjets."'
