Tip for the price-conscious (but not style-conscious) man

'I certainly don't look a million dollars but do I look £30? From a distance, most blokes reckon it'll do. For a funeral of someone you didn't really like, for instance. Sharp-eyed girls are more fussy. The polyester fails any touch-test. No one will stroke me for fear of electrocution.

What else can I use it for? "It goes well with our £60 wedding dress," says the spokeswoman. I'll drink - a bottle of £2.98 Asda Cava Brut - to that'

- Patrick Barkham reviews the Asda £30 suit, made in Romania, China and Bangladesh. Guardian Weekly, 17 February 2006

[A bystander quips, 'you don't have to ever have them cleaned, you just throw them away'. Note for the price-conscious shopper: Asda also sell £3 jeans]