We didn't start the [expletive] fire

A woman in a chain store in Texas used the f-word in conversation with her mother when she realised that the store was out of batteries, as a tropical storm approached. While this is poor manners, Kathryn Fridge didn't expect to be arrested for the expletive... by a fireman.

"I was like, 'Dang.' I looked at my mom and said, 'They're all ----ing gone," Fridge recalled.

Suddenly, Capt. Alfred Decker, the La Marque assistant fire marshal, appeared from around the corner, dressed in a fire department uniform.

"He said, 'You need to watch your mouth,' " Fridge said.

Perplexed by who the man was — his badge said "fire department" — Fridge offered a scant apology.

"I was like, 'Oh, OK. Sorry?' " she said.

Fridge walked away, but said the man ordered her to come back. She then protested, telling him she was having a private conversation with her mother that was none of his business. When the man ordered her to come to him and she refused, she said he pulled out his handcuffs

Next week: parking wardens to be issued with 007's licence to kill.

- Houston Chronicle, 13 August 2008